Books for Adoption. :)

Hi everyone!

Sorry it has been a bit quiet around here the last few days. I had a minor surgery on Monday, and have been recuperating by sitting around all week. :) I should be back to regularly posting soon!

I went through and finished organizing my shelves last weekend, and in the process, I found a few books that I have doubles of. I'm posting a picture here. If you would like any (or all) of these, please comment below and I will mail them your way (first come, first serve). I will say that I bought Barchester Towers new, and it is definitely an older book. The same goes for David Copperfield, but that is the edition I read last year!

Again, if you'd like any of these, comment below with your e-mail and I'll get in touch with you. I hope all 4 books can find a new home soon!

Book 154: The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath.

“The silence depressed me. It wasn't the silence of silence. It was my own silence.”

Going in to my second read of The Bell Jar, I wasn't sure how I was going to react. The first time I read Plath's novel, I was about 19 and home for the summer. A group of girls at the park were all reading the novel and they convinced me to read it as well. We all ended up talking about it a great deal, since many of us related to it in the same way. However, I do remember big pieces of the novel not necessarily relating to my life, and perhaps I didn't get everything from the novel I should have.

I will admit I was apprehensive about reading this again, but it felt right, so I dug in. The novel is no less painful the second time around-Esther Greenwood's spiral into depression is still absorbing and terrifying. Thankfully, I have a bit more perspective on my own life to not see as many connections, and I can understand the real significance of Plath's work and what Esther's spiral downward means for women, the feminist movement, and depression in general.

Essentially, The Bell Jar follows the story of Esther Greenwood, who is living in New York City at the start of the novel after winning a contest to work for a magazine. Her life is rather glamorous in the city. She lives with other girls who are also interning. They get free make-up and clothes, go to fancy parties, and seem to be headed on a successful track. However, as Esther starts to look closely at the life she's living, she realizes there are big holes in who she is, and she becomes unsure of the direction her life is headed. That is when the spiral begins. She stops caring. She stops feeling. She eventually stops doing everything because it all seems pointless. She says,

“I couldn’t see the point of getting up. I had nothing to look forward to.” 

She also points out at one point that she stopped bathing and showering. Her point was that she was just going to get dirty again, so why bother to get clean in the first place? To someone who has never experienced that kind of depression, I'm sure that thinking seems...silly. And while I have never suffered from severe depression, I can understand Esther.

For the period of time after Matt and I were first married and I was completely unemployed, I went through some of those motions as well. I was in our apartment non-stop, refused to go out and see friends, and yes, went days without showering because really, what was the point? That kind of thinking it scary, and if you haven't experience, I imagine it must be hard to relate to Esther.

And for Esther, a lot of those feelings emerge once she starts thinking about her life and her "inadequacies."

“The trouble was, I had been inadequate all along, I simply hadn't thought about it.” 

She believes that she has merely been skating along her entire life. Yes, while she was smart, she never had to work for anything. Everything she has asked for or worked for, she has gotten. So when she loses a writing internship shortly before she is due home from New York, it is the last straw to tipping her over the edge. That was the piece I believed I related to when I read this as a college student. College was really the first time I didn't feel as smart as I could of been. I wasn't the best writer in my English classes, I was the most knowledgeable in my history courses. That feeling of inadequacy was something I wasn't used to. I have seen realized that everyone feels that way at some point. And it's okay to feel that way. We all aren't super-geniuses.

It was after I passed this point on this read that I could see the rest of Esther's spiral into depression from different points of view. Obviously, knowing more about Plath and her life gives me better perspective about her writing of such a topic. I can also understand the historical significance of why Esther rebels so hard against the dream of getting married and having children (something that went over my head the last time I read this).

“That’s one of the reasons I never wanted to get married. The last thing I wanted was infinite security and to be the place an arrow shoots off from. I wanted change and excitement and to shoot off in all directions myself, like the colored arrows from a Fourth of July rocket.”

In all, my read of The Bell Jar was enlightening this time around. It's not an easy book to read (in part because the descent into depression seems so normal at points-that's off-putting), but it is an important novel, and one that I think is worthy of reading a few times. It also inspired me to learn a bit more about Plath. I've already ordered a volume of her journals, since I find her to be such an interesting woman. So, if you haven't read it, I think you should.

“I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart. I am, I am, I am.”

Book 153: The Return of the Native by Thomas Hardy.

“Of love it may be said, the less earthly the less demonstrative. In its absolutely indestructible form it reaches a profundity in which all exhibition of itself is painful.” 

The Return of the Native by Thomas Hardy is the first classic I've read and completely finished in recent months. It was the perfect choice as my first classic "back in the game" of regular blogging and reminded me why I love classics so much in the first place. Because while YA and genre fiction is fun and entertaining, it doesn't give me as much satisfaction and love as a classic does. Not to mention, Hardy is a superb writer and never disappoints me.

I've come to expect a number of things from Hardy when I read one of his novels-well-developed and rounded characters, a beautiful backdrop, and tragedy. The Return of the Native lives up to those things (although, I still think Jude the Obscure wins for being the most tragic of all the Hardy novels I've read).

The novel takes place in Egdon Heath-a beautiful piece of country that provides the dramatic backdrop to the actions of the characters. The main conflict of the novel centers on a very elaborate love triangle...err...square. Or something of that sort. The lonely Diggory Venn is a reddlemen in the area and is desperately in love with Thomasin Yeobright. She, while acknowledging the fact that Venn loves her, has already pledged herself to Wildeve (a man who has already messed up their wedding day once as the novel opens). However, Wildeve is also a bit confused about his feelings, as he also loves a woman named Eustacia Vye. It all comes to a head when Thomasin's cousin, Clym Yeobright "returns" from Paris and catches the attention of Eustacia (he is the native the title refers to). The rest of the novel is one of deception, false hopes, and the loss of hope as the characters struggle to understand their identities and who they actually love.

What I loved most about this novel is the way Hardy constructed the two quietest characters. The first, Thomasin Yeobright, is a woman who is very quiet. She is insistent on marrying Wildeve, even after he made her look quite scandalous, because it is the right thing to do. After that decision, she is a character that things happen to. She lives her life, relatively content in the decision she made, and things happen around her to change her life. The second quiet character, Venn, is one that I quite loved. He's very central in the beginning and end of the novel, but disappears for a bit in the middle. When the reader first meets him, he is pining for dear Thomasin and even proposes marriage to her. Once he learns that she won't have him, he insists on making sure that her life is as happy as possible. There are a couple of instances where he interferes in the actions of Wildeve or Eustacia to ensure Thomasin's happiness. That's the kind of man I can admire. He is more concerned with her happiness than winning her hand.

The other character I quite enjoyed is Thomasin's aunt and Clym's mother, Mrs. Yeobright. She appeared to be one of those meddling type of women, who assume their thoughts and wishes are the only way, and it must be done as they say. She is not content with the decisions either of her two charges take and winds up quite lonely. Her story was certainly one of the most tragic-I imagine watching your children pull away from you is quite a miserable experience.

As for Clym...I  really liked him and his hopes. He came back from Paris with the hopes of opening a school to educate his people-and he was focused on that dream throughout all the actions of the novel. He didn't waver from pursuing that dream, even with Eustacia's pressure to go back to Paris. His fate, by the end of the novel, was also quite tragic and I felt badly for him.

In all, the novel is really about the idea of hopes and dreams-and what steps you are willing to take to achieve them. All of the characters are consumed by something out of reach and it is their decision to either let the dream go (like dear Venn and his love for Thomasin), or to continue to pursue it, no matter the cost (like Eustacia's constant brooding and desire to leave Egdon Heath for Paris). Whether they get what they want or something else entirely is something I won't tell you.

This is definitely one of my favorite Hardys so far, and an excellent piece of Victorian fiction. I cannot recommend it enough!

“How I have tried and tried to be a splendid woman, and how destiny has been against me! ...I do not deserve my lot! ...O, the cruelty of putting me into this ill-conceived world! I was capable of much; but I have been injured and blighted and crushed by things beyond my control! O, how hard it is of Heaven to devise such tortures for me, who have done no harm to heaven at all!”

Mini-Reviews Part 3 (Adult Titles).

This is the third and final post in my attempt to catch up talking about the books I've read this year and haven't reviewed. The first two posts focused on young adult titles and this one is all about those adult books I've picked up and read in the last few months.

Keep in mind that these are just short little blurbs about the books and my impressions of them.

Loteria by Mario Alberto Zambrano

I was actually pitched this book for review and accepted for two reasons. First, the cover. Second, the title. If you are unfamiliar with Loteria, it is a card game-a bit like bingo-from Mexico. I took a lot of Mexican and Mexican-American history courses in college for my history degree (I have a specialization in Mexican-American Culture and Studies), and in one of my courses, a professor taught us how to play Loteria. I haven't played or seen cards since then, but when I saw the title of this book, I knew I had to read it.

Young Luz Castillo has been taken in by the state while her father is in jail and her sister is in the ICU. Alone and feeling very isolated, she takes to writing a journal in a very interesting way. With a deck of Loteria cards at her side, she pulls a card and writes a piece of her history. What unfolds is a very touching and emotional story of her childhood and how her family fell apart.

I loved this book. It was raw, emotional, and tugged at every heart-string. This is one of those books you don't see coming...but you need to read it. I promise.

*I will warn you that Zambano throws in quite a few Spanish phrases. Most you can pick up from context clues, but some are a bit trickier. I figured them out from my background, but some might be hard for you if you don't know any Spanish.

The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz

This was a book not at all on my radar. I really don't read contemporary adult fiction. I really couldn't tell you what's "popular" right now. But I remember hearing someone on the blogosphere raving about this book, and I had it in the back of my mind. So, while down in Indiana in May for the Indy 500, I went to the bookstore with my sister-in-law. This was on a shelf and jumped out at me. So I bought it.

At times this book was...absurd that I laughed out loud. There were phrases that just jumped off the page...including quite a few f-bombs. It just seemed so raw and edgy. It was in my face and aggressive. The footnotes were insightful and interesting. I just sucked them up.

The book is about the life of Oscar Wao, a Dominican living in the United States. Through a series of different narrators, the book explores Oscar's life and how he became the person he is. In some ways, the book reminded me of One Hundred Years of Solitude-not the magical realism part, but the depth of family history and strength.

By the end of the novel, I was completely obsessed. It was a book that just took me over. And told me that perhaps I need to read more adult fiction...from this era. :)

Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls by David Sedaris

I've never read anything by Sedaris, but he is one of those writers I've been meaning to get to. Then this book came out and I was so intrigued by the cover and title that I figured I would read it soon. Then I happened to win a copy from the 24-Hour Readathon, so it was perfect.

This is a collection of essays from Sedaris about a whole range of topics. Many made me chuckle and I flipped through them rather quickly. I will say that some of them would have gone over better had I been listening to Sedaris talk. I feel like a lot of his humor is lost in the written form. He must be hilarious in person.

I did enjoy my first exposure and have another one of his titles on my shelf (Me Talk Pretty One Day). He is someone I will definitely read more of in the future!


As you can see, I don't read much in the way of current adult fiction and non-fiction, so please give me some recommendations for other titles to check out. I think I read diversely, but I know this is an area I know nothing about. :)

28.

Today is my 28th birthday! And while I'm not that excited about getting older, I am glad to put 27 behind me.

The last year has been incredibly eventful. I started my first official year of teaching. My brother had his first baby-my Goddaughter Zoey-in October. I was diagnosed with Lupus. And I've struggled to balance the different aspects of my life-mainly keeping a balance between work, illness, and my sanity.

So, I am glad to put 27 behind me, and I am looking forward to 28 with high hopes. I'm going to be starting my second official year of teaching (which I am really excited about-I've started prepping already!). Zoey is going to be turning 1. Watching her get bigger and being a big part of her life has been amazing. I consider it prep for a future kiddo in my future. ;) Matt and I have plans for potentially seeking out a house in the future (the original plan was to start looking this fall, but I don't think we're ready). Also, I want to keep my health in check, and since starting a new medication (Humira), I've been feeling a lot more optimistic about staying healthy.

And, of course, lots and lots of reading.

I've never been more grateful for my corner of the internet. The last year was emotionally trying, and I am so glad that when I did come and write, there was always someone listening. That has been a big comfort to me. So thank you.

Here's to another great year!