Since returning to school full time last week, I have been managing a balancing act with all of my responsibilities and hobbies. A large part of me is grumpy, since I now have less free time to get all of those little things done that I so want to do.
I know that things will begin to settle down into a routine. I am making sure that I am being as productive as possible while I am at school, so I don't have to bring work home with me. In my last long-term sub job, I lived at school. Since I had an hour and fifteen minute drive each way, I was up by 4:45 and out the door an hour later to be at school by 7. Many, many days I was at school until at least 5 before beginning the long drive home. And at least once a week I was at school even longer (I think the latest I ever stayed was 7:30). I was always working. I brought things home with me every night and would marathon prep and grade on weekends. I will say that there were some other....circumstances surrounding the job that made me into such a workaholic.
It wasn't good for me in many ways. There were many school nights where Matt would come over to see me and I would beg him to help me. And of course, I would pass out as soon as we settled down to watch TV.
I am taking all kinds of precautions to make sure this doesn't happen again. I know that running myself ragged did not make me a better teacher, or a better person. I was stressed, exhausted, and insane.
So far, I have managed a good balance. It helps that hardly any of the teachers stay more than 15 minutes past the last bell. That encourages me to come home (which is a 5 minute drive away). And I have been much better about getting as much done at school as possible.
I feel like I am handling those responsibilities well. I'm not freaking out. In fact, I feel confident that I am doing a good job and maintaining that balance.
The problem begins once I get home from school. Perhaps it is just my body adjusting, but I am exhausted by the time I get home. I don't want to do anything, and I especially don't want to take care of the many things I need to around the apartment. I have been making a conscious effort to do "fifteen-minute" clean ups around the apartment, where I set the timer and go crazy for 15 minutes so rooms get picked up and maintained.
However, I still lack motivation to read and blog. Again, this might be my body adjusting to being on a "normal" schedule, but I don't always feel like reading when I come home from a long day of hammering knowledge into my students' heads.
So here are my questions for my fellow bloggers. How do you find a balance between your real-life responsibilities and the things you want to do? Do you have any other tricks or tips for me? I would appreciate any advice you have, from cleaning, to blogging, to cooking, to writing entries, and to keeping yourself sane in a busy world!
Thank you all!
I had exactly the same problem that you are having at the end of last year - and I solved it by reducing blogging and reading to almost nil. It totally took the pressure off, I was then more able to focus on those others things that are much more important, and when I felt like I was ready again I started reading again and then slowly added blogging into the mix.
ReplyDeleteUltimately this is just a hobby and you have to put youself first.
Hope that helps
Sadly, I read less. I find myself carving out those times that I'm actually willing and able to read. That means mornings before the fam wakes up. That also means lunch at work. And it's the nights that I can stay awake. I'm sure your body will fall into a rhythm, so try not to be too hard on yourself. :)
ReplyDeleteI am working on balance too. I haven't found my balance yet this semester because it started 2 days ago. But I've been trying to find quick meals that I can throw together in the morning, which will (hopefully) make getting out the door easier. I try to plan my outfits a few days in advance to cut down on that nightmare. In regards to being exhausted when I walk in the door...I know how that goes. I try to give myself about an hour to unwind. Almost always I get right to task afterward. However, there are some days where that feels impossible and I listen to that inclination.
ReplyDeleteI have yet to achieve balance, so I don't know if there are any tips I can give you! For the past couple years, I've just been giving up on the work in order to read. Now, I'm trying to do more work, read less, and listen to more on audio. It's actually working pretty well so far!
ReplyDeleteI say: don't pressure your self to read allot. If you only do 1 book every week or so, that's cool. Just keep things fresh with fun memes like Teaser Tuesday, Book Beginning Friday, Roving Reader, etc.
ReplyDeleteGood luck! :)
Allie, as a teacher in her twenty-sixth year of teaching elementary school I know well of what you speak. I'm not sure I have many answers, but here's what works for me: leave my school work for school. I'll stay after a few hours or so once in awhile, but not every day, and I won't bring it home. Home is my time, time I need for me to restore. My mother would say to me, "If your cup is half empty, how do you have enough to fill someone else's?" I know that taking care of myself is not selfish, but critical to my well being and therefore those around me. Plus, it's always hard going back after break. Isn't it funny how we lose the routine in just a few short weeks?
ReplyDeleteI work 4 10 hour days, so I do very little during the week. I have to break up my walking to get it all in...a little when I get up, and I walk at lunch and breaks. I sneak some blogging in at work, but it's mostly a weekend thing. And we always cook extras, so there are leftovers during the week. And I do all my chores on the weekend. Doesn't make for a very fun weekend sometimes, but at least the weeknights are low key.
ReplyDeleteAnd I think teaching is an exhausting job, since you have to be "on"...it's like performing.
Each personality is different. I insist on balance in my life and strive to maintain an even strain and not let the things that matter most be at the mercy of the things that matter the least. A little of this and a little of that--simplify, simplify, simplify and then add things back in slowly. They will find their proper place or drift away. Unless you are a professional blogger, this all should be for fun and relaxation.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to put in a good word for rest. Real rest, that is, lying all the way down in a quiet place with absolutely everything off. No book, no music, no nothing. At first it feels like I'll never want to get up again, and all sorts of thoughts race through my mind, but somehow, magically, after just 10 or 15 minutes I suddenly notice I am calm, re-energized and motivated to do the things that need to be done, and so I go do them. It takes a bit of discipline at first but I'm sure it's much better for the mind and body than just pushing through fatigue.
ReplyDeleteI think everybody has to find their own balance...I am always exhausted when we return to school after a break. I guess it's just a readjustment. I also think there are going to be times that you are more interested in some things than others...and you just have to "roll with it." You can't force yourself to write or read...you love both, so don't do anything that will make you resent either.
ReplyDeleteI know exactly how you feel. I have a 10-yo and a 6-yo, complete with all of their activities. I work full-time, often not getting home until after 6 PM. I'm training for a half-marathon. And I blog. I fit my reading in at lunch and before bed until I can't keep my eyes open. I started writing on the weekends and scheduling posts in advance as much as possible. Taking copious notes helps in remembering everything I want to say for my reviews.
ReplyDeleteAs for the house, I try to at least keep it picked up throughout the week. I also do at least one load of laundry each day, so that I am not facing a mountain of laundry on the weekends. Saturdays are for cleaning. The house isn't going to get that dirty that I need to sacrifice precious time during the week.
The key is not pushing it. If you don't feel like reading, don't. If you don't feel like blogging, don't. If you don't feel like cleaning, don't. It will all get done in good time. Good luck!
I blog for hobby, so hobby it is. My priority is my family, my job and my house. I read and blog when I have the extra time, as a way to relax. If it ever feels like a chore, then it's time to take a break. And that's okay too.
ReplyDeleteWhat is balance? ;-)
ReplyDeleteI'm with the person above me. The blog comes last! Reading is right above it -- and must NEVER be less important than the blog.
I find looking at my week and making out a schedule helps the most...
I agree with Jillian about the importance of making a schedule, other wise I find myself giving too much time to things that immediately in front of my eyes and not enough to activities that are more important but not happening at that instant. I don't know how teachers are valued in your part of the world, but in the UK they are constantly knocked as working 9-3 for only part of the year (all those long holidays). As someone who was in the profession in one form or another for almost forty years I would love to show your piece to those detractors. Give any one of them a single day in the classroom and they would go so far under they would never be seen again. I'm rooting for you.
ReplyDeleteGood luck! I imagine that when I'm healthy enough for work, I'll end up cutting drastically back on blogging. Just now that even if you post less frequently, or don't comment as much, we'll still be around and happy when you do pop up in our feeds!
ReplyDeleteBack when I worked, I always made simple meals during the week, cleaned up the kitchen as I went and made sure the dishes were in the dishwasher or washed before anything else. We basically both made sure we picked up after ourselves during the week and made the bed every morning before leaving-it always looks so much more cleaner with a simple 1 minute job. Saturday mornings-I did the wash as I went through and did a 2 hour clean-dusting, vacuuming, washing the floors, etc. (it's an apartment-shouldn't take more than that) By noon everything was done and I was free for the weekend. I loved grocery shopping back then. Make ahead meals and make doubles and freeze for those during the week meals.
ReplyDeleteYou just need to figure out what you want to accomplish during the week-maybe set at least one or two nights where you know you have to grade and you won't be able to read or blog. Give yourself an hour after you get home to just be, then get moving for an hour and see where you are. Everyone has to find there own niche. Don't forget, working out really does destress you-even if it's only for 30 min. a day. I find having a clutter free place, gives me more of a peacefulness around me.
Love, Mom
Good luck! It's tough. I agree with what others have said. You have to come first. Don't worry about your readers. We love your blog and will come whether you post every day, once a week, or once a month. Your family, job, health, and sanity have to come first.
ReplyDeleteI really liked reading all the comments on this post -- there are a lot of good ideas. I just started a full time job in May, and adjusting to that and blogging has has been tough. One thing I try to do is limit the number of posts I expect of myself, so not posting every day. I also try to fit in reading in the morning, at lunch, and before bed. And I'm a bit fan of writing and planning ahead when possible. I have not been great about that recently, but it always made blogging easier when I had a few posts written and ready to go for when I wanted to write something but wasn't in the mood.
ReplyDeleteMy schedule is much more flexible than it used to be. My schedule during my first real job, however, was similar to what you describe. I also worked in education and commuted 30 minutes each way. My students were much younger than yours so there wasn't as much grading and such to do in the evenings but I worked with high-needs/high-risk students so often came home emotionally drained. I didn't blog at that time, but in regard to cleaning and cooking, here were my remedies:
ReplyDelete1)Cooking: Simple, simple simple. During the winter I would make big pots of soup or lasagna, or casseroles on Sundays so that we could heat it up for dinner for the first several nights of the week. This was most assuredly my saving grace, as neither my husband or myself like to eat out. Of course, you have to be content to eat the same thing for several nights in a row. I never minded a bit - I was just glad to be able to heat up dinner instead of having to start from scratch.
2)Cleaning: Again, keeping the environment simple is a big help. My main priority was keeping the kitchen and bathroom clean and sanitary - in regards to everything else, just "tidy" would suffice (i.e. I didn't stress out too much about keeping every surface clear and dusted)
Mainly, I'd say just keep it simple and don't stress the small stuff (cliche, but true).
I started a brand new job last September and I've just about feel like I've settled into it - I think you always forget how jarring such a new situation can be! I agree with many of the people above me - I never bring work home with me, if it means staying later, so be it! And also, I find being anal about time helps: after 8pm, I do what I want to do to relax - no chores (except cooking because, weirdly, that relaxes me!), no thinking about work - just a bath/reading/blogging if I fancy it or just watching TV with my partner before bed. I find it makes me switch onto "me time" better if I have a certain time when it's compulsory :)
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain, and I wish I had the answer. My best advice is to do what you have to do (work, eat, sleep), then do what you want to do (read, tv, blog), and then do the rest of that crap (dishes, dusting, etc.). :) But that's just me.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Trisha. I do what has to be done first because then I can fully enjoy what I want to do. I also spend 30 minutes exercising the minute I get home from work. Believe it or not, it's relaxing in the long run and helps me sleep better.
ReplyDeleteHabits are funny things... we all get used to a level of activity and when responsibilities increase we feel burdened. But I have also found that the more I have to do, the more I get done.
Good luck! You'll get into the swing of things soon enough.
I agree 3whole-heartedly with Trisha. I work full-time, review theatre once a week in addition to that and then try to squeeze in time with my husband, family, friends, etc, while also reading/blogging. The dusting often falls by the wayside. I always feel better when I'm a week or so ahead on posts, so I know that if I don't have time to blog, something is still going up tomorrow. It gives me a cushion for the unexpected things life throws at me.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I don't work outside the home, I do feel being a stay-at-home mom is a full time job in some ways! My thoughts on how to balance: remember priorities. Feeding my son dinner is a priority. Reading blogs is not. You know, just take one day at a time and when the blog starts to slip, I know I need to let it. I have gone through a few stages of blogging -- I started when my son slept 13 hours at night plus took a three hour nap. He's three and it 's not like that anymore!
ReplyDeleteMaybe for you, as you begin this new stage, cleaning the house or blogging isn't the priority over making tomorrow's lesson plan or getting an extra hour of sleep. I think we all understand that it's a struggle!